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September 6, 2002
TherapyPants
I know, I know it's been nine years since I've updated. I'm feeling kind of blah, and it seems like I'm always busy busy busy. I have no idea how working mothers survive. Bless them all, dammit.
Here are pictures of Quinn in the infamous purple spandex shorts. They are probably some of the least flattering pix of Quinn I've seen, but...not every day is a Rock Star day. You might as well know that up front.
Note that she's wearing her saucy fire engine pajama top with the pretty pants. 
Oh, she can stand up against things now! Isn't that exciting???
OK, the next one showcases the sewn-together legs that prevent her from doing the splits. It also showcases what she looks like when she has a breath-holding spell. (Those are still happening, much to our dismay.)
Please notice her Augustus Gloop hair. She's annoyed because she's trying to sit and she can't just spread her legs and fall backwards on her butt...she has to actually maneuver her butt over to the side and do what's called a "side sit." She loathes the side sit. Loathes it.
In other news, her EMG is still scheduled for a week from today. The doctor's assistant thought it might be cancelled, given that the bloodwork they've gotten back doesn't show any Spinal Muscular Atrophy, but we haven't heard of any cancellations thus far.
The past two therapy sessions have been very hard on the bunny. She has cried pretty much the entire hour. Why? Probably from frustration: her therapist, Kim, is preventing her from moving in the familiar, comfortable ways and forcing her to learn new ways of moving. That pisses Quinn off, and she fights back every chance she gets by pushing the opposite way that Kim is trying to get her to move. (For example, she pushes backwards when Kim is trying to push her forwards in a crawling position.)
Kim also does infuriating things like moving toys out of Quinn's reach so that she is inspired to try and stand up to get them, or crawl forward, or crawl down a slope. Quinn gets so pissed that her whole head turns red and she screams and cries and I have to constantly mop tears and boogers from her face. It's very hard to watch her struggle so much.
I'm trying hard not to be angry that Quinn has to go through this routine. She could have so much wrong with her. We have seen so many kids at Children's that are far worse off than Quinn is. We are grateful that we see progress every week, and that she has such wonderful people on her case.
It's still hard, though, to not wonder...is it my fault she was born like this? Did I do something wrong when I was pregnant that caused her muscles to be all floppy? Am I doing enough to help her out now? I just hate, hate, hate seeing her anything but her happy, content, goofy bunny self.
Posted by Amy at September 6, 2002 12:28 PM
Comments
that last picture is beautiful.we're all rooting for you, Quinn!
Posted by: lara at September 6, 2002 1:05 AM
Amy, I am so glad you posted pics of bunny in her purple spandex shorts. That made my day. She's one adorable bunny! I hope things continue to improve. Garrett and I will be thinking of you!
Posted by: Carmen at September 6, 2002 1:51 AM
What a cutie!You didn't do a danged thing to cause this, you know. Honestly, I think that just about every baby I know has had some issue or another. My friend's baby had to have surgery done on his penis to correct a sideways lean. Zeke had bacterial pneumonia. Another friend's baby had CANCER!! at the age of four months. (Gone now, all better, thank goodness.) Every mom I know whose baby has gone through something like this asks herself, "Is it something I did?" The mom of the cancer baby was convinced it was because she drank a Diet Coke every day of her third trimester.But it's totally not anyone's fault. These things just happen, and the great thing is, Quinn is getting better. Look at her standing up like little Miss Thing! You go, Quinn!
Posted by: Jan, of the 12pointfont Jans at September 6, 2002 2:20 AM
Olivia was a year old and still hadn't rolled over or crawled, let along stood or walked. She had lots of PT and it brought her up to speed.Now she's almost 4 and SHE DOES NOT STOP HOPPING. Hop hop hopping all the time and showing us how high she can jump.Bunny will live up to her nickname soon.
Posted by: Funder at September 6, 2002 5:22 AM
Are you talking about the Olivia who held Keegan's hand at Amy's baby shower? The one who kept showing me her shirt and who got more presents from Glo than Amy did?That Olivia is hopping?Wow.
Posted by: Auntie Rikoshay at September 6, 2002 5:43 AM
There is simply no chance that Quinn will ever fail to have a Rock Star Day! You can't keep beauty like hers hidden -- not even purple spandex can do it. (I think when she's in those shorts and your back is turned there's a little flashdancing going on.) There's going to be a day when Quinn is running all over the place, doing all kinds of crazy physical things, and no one else will know, and she won't remember, how hard she worked as a little Bunny starting out. Just keep hanging in there. :)
Posted by: Marcia at September 6, 2002 9:24 AM
Look at all of Quinneth Paltrow's progress! Look at her standing! Just go look!When we went to dinner with Quinnamin and her parents just weeks ago, she didn't even try to help you out when you held her.Last week at dinner, she was clinging to my shirt and supporting herself quite nicely. (Either that or she was just tensed up because I scare her)I think that it's normal to wonder about what could have been done before now, but the most important thing is to concentrate on what is being done now. Despite the fact that her therapy is hard on Quinn and even harder on you, you are taking her every week and you are working with her at home. You are being a good mommy bunny and Andy is being a good chimpy daddy.And all you have to do is look at that spandex-clad bunny who can stand at her toys today and you can see how far she has come. Therapy is going to get easier and she is going to be completely mobile before you know it.Then you'll be thinking, "Remember how nice it was when you stayed in one place little bunny." That's the thing with being the mommy, it's always something--and it's usually something hard.Love to all!
Posted by: Auntie Rikoshay at September 6, 2002 9:29 AM
I know all about feeling the "Mother Guilt" and I think it just comes with the job. I know logically I didn't do anything to cause Ty to be born with only one kidney, but does it stop me from feeling that way???Noooooooooooo!Your sweet little girl is showing wonderful progress and she has a ton of people cheering her on. It doesn't make it any easier to watch her struggle, but she's going to be okay.With you as her Mommy, how could she not be anything but?
Posted by: Athena at September 8, 2002 5:28 AM
I love my Quinny and I miss her sooo much. She will always be a rockstar to me and she will always be perfect!
Posted by: cousin maureen at September 8, 2002 10:26 AM
Those are some snazzy pants!! I think she looks darn good in them :D. I know you can't help but worry what if, did I, etc., but you KNOW that there was nothing to change that would have made a difference, and the biggest thing you can do to affect it now is hug her, love her ,help her, and wipe away the tears and boogers;) as she works her Bunny-Butt off :P. It is sooo great to see her standing and hear about the great (though hard-earned) progress!! Here's to much more progress and much less hard-work ;).
Posted by: Kristin at September 10, 2002 6:23 AM