This entry is kind of gross

I finally feel like a HUMAN BEING today! Almost one week after getting sick. That doesn't sound long, I know, but I seriously think this has been the worst week of my life.

Every day I'd wake up and think, IS THIS THE DAY? THE DAY I CAN SWALLOW AGAIN???" And...nope. Well, you can, but HAHAHA it's going to hurt like HOT FLAMES AND RUSTY NAILS going down!!! WILL THE MOUTH SORES HAVE DIMISHED? Nope. In fact, they've grown! All around my teeth, on my gums! On the sides of my tongue! On my lower lip, on the inside, where your tongue can't help but pushing into it constantly, wondering at the weirdness and painfulness of it all. Down my throat in clumps. Behind my molars in the back recesses of my mouth. Along the roof of my mouth. I'm sorry be to so gross, but I have never had discomfort like that in my LIFE. The swollen lymph nodes that hurt when I turned my head too fast--fine. The 102 degree fever that rose and fell and rose and fell and rose and fell--fine. The accompanying joint and muscle aches--four Advil at a time helped a little. But the sore throat and mouth sores...NOTHING helped. I couldn't eat or drink except for the absolute bare minimum, and it pretty much sent me into an hour of continuous pain every time I did it.

I'm very frustrated with my doctor, who told me it was viral (which it is, as my trip to the ER confirmed yesterday) and there was nothing she could do.

Well, the REASON I went to the ER yesterday is that they have the drugs! Andy somehow muscled an antibiotic out of my doctor's office on Friday when I lay in bed sobbing with pain, but it wasn't doing anything. So I didn't want that. I wanted some BIG FANCY PAINKILLERS. And I got them!

The kindly ER staff gave me a steriod shot to ease the swelling in my throat, Darvocet for pain, and...AND...manna of the gods...a Lidocaine solution that you swish around in your mouth (it's really thick) and it coats everything in there and NUMBS IT FOR HOURS! Sweet, sweet Lidocaine, how I love you. You have the same consistency as boogers, yet I look forward to you every four hours like I've looked forward to nothing else in my life, not even the sequel to Romancing the Stone, which I saw in the theatre seven times.

But when my doctor saw me writhing in pain in her office, why didn't she give me some painkillers and that LiDOCAINE???? And the steriod shot for my throat? My week didn't have to suck THIS much.

I still can't eat, really, even though I'm feeling better today. Everything burns. BURNS MY MOUTH. Poor Andy has been out to buy various liquids, and he has gone happily, but each one burns more than the next. Orange Juice? Um, yeah, bye bye. Gatorade? OW! Orange drink from McDonald's? Fire! The only thing that has seemed to work is Kool-Aid, and only then in small doses.

I ate some oatmeal this morning and it hurt despite the recently applied Lidocaine, but I made myself because my WORD was it good! But that's all I really feel like eating today, thanks. I'll just have a happy mouth and a grumbly tumbly.

Andy has been astoundingly supportive, of course, doing absolutely everything to juggle Quinn, my needs, my not-really-needs but luxuries, and work. I hope that if he ever needs me the way I needed him this past week that I can be half as gracious in my nursing as he's been. He's never made me feel like a burden, not once...I think I will be keeping him.

My mom has inherited Quinn for the past 3 days for varying lengths of time and for several meals and snacks, and I don't know who has been more grateful for her...me, Andy, or Quinn, the Queen of Condo D.

Today Andy took Quinn up to Kenosha to watch the Bears game with Uncle Kevin at Uncle Dennis' house. Andy called a while ago and said that Quinn was lying in Uncle Dennis' bed, eating milk and cookies and watching Noggin. She told Dennis, "You can leave now."

And I'm going to go continue laundry (HOT WATER AND BLEACH FOR YOU AND YOU AND ALL OF YOU) and watch "Gilmore Girls" and ... that's about it.

Posted by Amy at December 03, 2006 02:48 PM