March 28, 2005
I've changed my mind about Terri Schiavo
Wow, does this ever sum up how I'm feeling about the Terri Schiavo case.
Posted by Amy at March 28, 2005 08:39 PM
Brilliant. I couldn't agree more.
I agree with all that. Congress? Mistake. Her not having a living will? Mistake. Most everything else? Mistake.
But I still think her husband seems a little too smarmy for all this to be on the up and up. Too bad she had to suffer (or not, depending on which doctor you believe) for 15 years in the meantime. I find it hard to believe that he whole-heartedly believes that she wants to die, and so much so that he's been willing to fight it for 7 years (and not the full 15). Seems like he's just fighting the parents, and not for Terri. He's got a new family. He's moved on. Why didn't he just divorce her and let the parents take care of her as they wanted? It's not like there's any money left for him to spend...
Can I just say that no one..(um, can I repeat that?).. NO ONE (sorry for yelling) seems to remember that her husband was not the only person who was informed of her wishes to NOT be kept alive via artificial means. I know all the propaganda re: he just wants a new life (who can blame him) but I just wanted to inject that little reminder into the blog world.
Thanks. I feel better now....
Wow! What a great article. Thanks for sharing it.
Amen. What a horrid case. Err on the side of life, but only when convenient and never when it comes to actually frying people to death.
Thanks for sharing that link...it really put into words what I was feeling about the whole thing. I love your site!
I had to ask Amy for the article, but discovered that I had already read it. I suspect this is one of those issues over which there will always be a great division. I happen to agree with whomever chooses to err on the side of life, regardless of their political affiliation and let's face it, when Congress got inovlved, both sides of the aisle were represented and were trying to vote their conscience and to reprsent as many points of view as possible. The bottom line for me is that of course no one would choose to live like this for 15 years. But the point is.....she did. And the point is she did not have a living will (and those are often asked to be interpreted so don't sit there all smug because you have one.) Make sure every possibility is covered because there's a chance that at some sad point in your life someone else might be called upon to make decisions they never thought they'd have to make. If you're that smart to know exactly what might or might not happen or be available to try and extend life, then you're far brighter than I. Basically, my family knows to not give up on me too easily. But back to Terri (and I have no problem calling her that - it was her name.) Certainly, Mrs. Schiavo seemed a bit ludicrous, especially, given the fact that Michael had pretty well moved on with his common-law wife and two children.
I'll share with you my personal message to whomever I thought could make a difference and stop the act of starving to death a human being.
To Whom it May Concern:
This will be a cut and dried case of MURDER if Terri Schiavo's feeding tube is removed. She is NOT on "life support" - we ALL have to eat to stay alive. She is breathing on her own and it is not up to a judge (a mere mortal) to determine that her quality of life isn't sufficient enough to let her live. For God's sake, her parents are willing to take care of their daughter (whom they knew and loved FAR longer than her so-called "husband.") If for no other reason, the recent recovery from a 20 year coma of Sarah Scantlin should prove to the world that WE cannot play God.
I am the mother of a 37 year old son who, over the course of time, has acquired rods in his spine for scoliosis, a tracheotomy, a G-tube for feedings and a permanent bladder catheter. He has been confined to a wheelchair since the age of three. Yes, his mind is intact, but as a family, we have labored (through LOVE) to care for his physical needs. I talked with him about Terri and asked for his thoughts. His simple response was that if her parents loved her enough to care for her, why should anyone else care. Amen.
PattyG
This just seemed like divine intervention, so here I am again:) After posting my own thoughts about Terri Schiavo, I came across a column by Lori Borgman which was in the Star on April 3rd.
April 3, 2005
Life is messy; so is death
On my desk sits a miniature Underwood typewriter like the relics journalism students labored over in reporting classes ages ago, or in the 1970s to be exact. This pipsqueak of a typewriter holds a small picture frame in which I tucked a quote by Ann Coulter that says, "Life is messy."
My mother, always current on the latest political news, would find it entertaining that I found comfort after her death from the writing of Ann Coulter, a personality not exactly known for expressing her sentiments in a warm, fuzzball sort of way.
My mother spent her final 16 days in an intensive care unit after suffering a brain aneurysm. There were times when I was not sure if intensive care was a place of medical miracles, or a foretaste of hell.
Life is messy and, sometimes, the end of life can be the messiest part of all.
My dad kept a small spiral notebook in his shirt pocket, where he wrote down the names of the doctors that came and went and what they did. I lost count after 10. It was a rare moment when doctor No. 7 knew what doctor No. 3 was doing.
Code blue. Ventilator, temporary. Coil the aneurysm. Drill two holes in the skull for drainage. Move IV from arm to the chest. Swallow reflex. Feeding tube. Uncomfortable to insert. Worse if they rip them out. Hand restraints. CAT scan. X-ray. Lung culture. Lumbar puncture. Infection possibility. Antibiotics?
There is one thing I learned from the constant barrage of questions and decisions, and it is this: How to say, "I don't know." Even doctors don't know. They can make an educated guess, but they don't always know.
The only ones who seem to know everything are the ones surrounding Terri Schiavo. Both sides speak with clarity and certainty. "By the way, viewers, may we remind you that Terri had weight and image problems. Here's a picture of her now, with sunken eyes, hollow cheeks and gaping mouth. More at the bottom of the hour as we discuss the euphoria that comes with dehydration."
Here's what I'd like to see: A pundit so clearly connected with the agony of it all that, unable to talk, he simply puts his head down and sobs. A young woman is brain damaged, a family is splintered and at war, a man calls himself her husband yet fathers children with another woman, and stricken parents who love their daughter and wish to care for her are forced by arms of their own government to watch her wither and starve. Would there be a more appropriate response than weeping?
I'd like to hear from those who haven't been standing behind the microphones -- nurses and hospice workers who have nurtured the last moments of life and tenderly brought dignity to death. From loved ones who have cared for those with terminal cancer and Alzheimer's. They don't have to theorize about suffering, they have lived suffering. It would benefit us greatly to hear from the parents of dearly loved children with severe disabilities. Like a wreck you can't turn away from, those parents have watched Terri Schiavo with lumps in their throats and pounding in their chests.
When you don't know with certainty, you move slowly -- very, very slowly -- because the decisions at the end of life are rarely as clear as the decisions at the beginning of life.
Comments may be sent to Lori Borgman at P.O. Box 30092, Indianapolis, IN 46230, or e-mailed to her at lori@loriborgman.com.
